AS the taxi driver beeps to let Emma Smith, 41, know he’s outside, she presses a quick kiss into her husband’s cheek and tells him she’ll text him when she reaches Bristol.
Joe, 42, thinks she’s going on a work trip, and she has made up that it’s in south west England to throw him off the scent. The truth is, Emma has a steamy night booked 200 miles away in Manchester with her secret lover.
She’s even gone to the trouble of booking a train ticket to Bristol from her local London station so that her back is covered if Joe goes snooping.
Inside her suitcase, beneath the neatly folded blouses meant to keep up the illusion, exposes all – lingerie, stiletto heels and a bodycon dress for a romantic dinner with Alex, 40.
She calls Alex her “boyfriend” and has been seeing him for over a year now after meeting online.
It was meant to be a harmless fling, but she soon developed into a fully-fledged extra-marital relationship.
Emma is not alone, with one study finding that 19% of married women admit to having an affair in the UK.
You might assume ladies offend way less than men, but you’d be wrong. The difference is just 1%, with one in 5 men admitting to an extra-marital relationship.
“It wasn’t something I planned,” Emma confesses. “Joe and I were more like roommates than husband and wife.
“We were introduced through pals in our Thirties and couldn’t keep our hands off each other in the early days.
“I loved how fiery he was and wore his jealous remarks like a badge of honour – as if they were proof of how much he loved and desired me.
“But after a decade of drifting apart, the passion was gone and his possessiveness became simply exhausting.”
The corporate manager, from London, signed up to IllicitEncounters, a dating website for married people wanting to have an affair, and soon connected with Alex.
Bosses at the brand assure that “marriages are happier as a result of affairs”.
[authenticated-scripts src=”%3Cscript%20class%3D%22palin-poll%22%20src%3D%22https%3A%2F%2Fwww.thesun.co.uk%2Fpollingwidgets%2Fv3%2Fwidget.js%3Fquestion_id%3D106252%26game%3Dpolling%22%3E%3C%2Fscript%3E” type=”embedded” width=”100″ /]The deceptive pair initially embarked on a casual fling, but Emma found herself falling for Alex and growing increasingly desperate to be around him.
“I knew it was wrong, but I couldn’t help myself,” she says.
[quote credit=”Emma Smith”]One day I noticed a man standing outside my office with a big umbrella and coffee. He looked totally innocent, but something in my gut told me he was tracking me[/quote]“Alex was everything Joe wasn’t: adventurous, spontaneous and wildly attentive.
“He hung on to my every word and made me feel like I was the most fascinating woman alive.
“We met in dimly lit restaurants, snogged through entire films in the cinema and took long drives to nowhere, parking in secluded spots to chat for hours on end.
“Our sex life was intoxicating and I craved Alex’s touch. For the first time in years, I felt desired and alive. I never wanted it to end.”
[quote credit=”Emma Smith”]Our sex life was intoxicating and I craved Alex’s touch. For the first time in years, I felt desired and alive. I never wanted it to end[/quote]But keeping the affair under wraps wasn’t easy.
Joe, who Emma married 10 years ago, has always had a jealous streak, which reared its ugly head when he noticed her change in behaviour.
“It didn’t go unnoticed that I was suddenly ‘working late’ more often, or that I joined a gym even though I’d never cared for it before,” she recalls.
“I was looking at my phone and smiling more than usual, and I was getting mani-pedis every two weeks like clockwork.
[quote credit=”Emma Smith”]I was always one step ahead. I knew my husband was watching me, so I made sure there was nothing for him to find[/quote]“Joe questioned everything.”
“Why are you suddenly always staying late at work? Why do you need a new wardrobe?” he’d ask, eyes narrowed.
And, finally, the big one: “Are you cheating on me?”
Emma denied the affair and hatched a plan to throw him off the scent.
She created a fake work project to explain her late nights, used a second phone to communicate with Alex and even enlisted a friend to cover for her when she needed an alibi.
“I was always one step ahead,” she says. “I knew Joe was watching me, so I made sure there was nothing for him to find.
“I even got a second phone solely for Alex.
“My second phone is the exact same make and model as my first one, so my husband will never suspect that it’s a totally different one.
[quote credit=”Emma Smith”]Being one step ahead of my husband gave me a total thrill[/quote]“I began deleting any soppy messages between Alex and I, which makes me sad as I love to read through them.”
But Joe wasn’t just relying on his own instincts. Convinced Emma was hiding something, he hired a private investigator to follow her.
“I had no idea at first,” Emma admits. “But looking back, there were signs – a car that seemed to follow me a few times, a stranger walking the exact same route as me.
“I realised what was happening and doubled down on my efforts to stay under the radar.
[quote credit=”Emma Smith”]I’m naturally a very observant person, so having a touch of paranoia helps in these situations[/quote]“One day I noticed a man standing outside my office with a big umbrella and coffee. He looked totally innocent, but something in my gut told me he was tracking me.
“I’m naturally a very observant person, so having a touch of paranoia helps in these situations.”
Emma began to mix up her routine and never met Alex in the same place twice.
She paid for everything in cash and swapped her bank statements to be digital only, so there was no chance of Joe opening her mail by accident and seeing something incriminating.
[quote credit=”Jessica Leoni” credit-meta=”Relationship expert “]People are more paranoid than ever, and instead of communicating with their partners, they’re turning to private investigators for answers[/quote]“I’ll admit that there were times I was wracked with nerves meeting up with Alex, and couldn’t properly enjoy our rendezvous as I was constantly looking over my shoulder,” she says.
“But on the whole, being one step ahead of my husband gave me a total thrill.”
Emma’s meticulous planning paid off. The private investigator was unable to find any concrete evidence of her affair, and eventually told Joe he was wrong.
He remorsefully told Emma everything about the investigation and even apologised to her for hiring someone to follow her around.
[quote credit=”Emma Smith”]I’ve rediscovered a part of myself that I thought was gone forever. I don’t want to give up what I’ve found, and I’ll do whatever it takes to protect that[/quote]“He said he’d been paranoid and that he trusted me,” she says. “It was a weird feeling – relief mixed with guilt. I knew I was lying to him, but I also knew I wasn’t ready to end things with Alex.”
For Emma, the affair isn’t just about sex – it’s about reclaiming a part of herself she thought she’d lost.
“This was five months ago, and I’m still seeing Alex,” she says.
“Alex is adventurous and makes me feel alive in a way I haven’t felt in years. I’ve rediscovered a part of myself that I thought was gone forever.
[quote credit=”Jessica Leoni” credit-meta=”Relationship expert”]Social media, dating apps, and websites like ours have made it easier than ever to have an affair, but they’ve also created a culture of suspicion[/quote]“I don’t want to give up what I’ve found, and I’ll do whatever it takes to protect that.”
Relationship experts say Emma’s case is not unusual, with private investigators reporting a surge in demand from people desperate to confirm their worst fears about their partners.
Jessica Leoni, a sex and relationships expert at IllicitEncounters.com, says trust issues in relationships are at an all-time high.
“Social media, dating apps, and websites like ours have made it easier than ever to have an affair, but they’ve also created a culture of suspicion,” she tells.
“People are more paranoid than ever, and instead of communicating with their partners, they’re turning to private investigators for answers.”
*Names have been changed