NATATLIE Cassidy has revealed she’s finally ‘forgiven herself’ over a horrific family loss.
The EastEnders actress – who recently quit the long-running soap – opened up on her bereavement on the latest episode of her podcast.
Speaking on Life with Nat, the star revealed she tragically lost her mother when she was just a teenager.
Natalie, 41, explained: “I lost my mum when I was 19.
“It was a time where I was out and about, I’ve spoken about this on the pod before, but when you’re a late teenager you’re not really thinking about your mum unfortunately.
“And I lost her quite suddenly and I’ve carried a lot of guilt really about the fact that I wasn’t there.
“I wasn’t there for her and didn’t spend the time I should have with her, but my brothers always say they were the same at that age and they got to come back because they were older.
“So I’ve kind of forgiven myself if you like, but the days for me don’t get any easier, you just learn to live with it.”
Nat added she wishes she could ring her mum for important life events such as the birth of her children and meeting the ‘man of her dreams’.
Natalie finished by revealing her late mum would be in her eighties now and it would have been ‘lovely to have her round for Sunday lunch’ on Mother’s Day.
Evelyn tragically died from bowel cancer aged just 63 in 2002.
[bc_video account_id=”5067014667001″ application_id=”” aspect_ratio=”16:9″ autoplay=”” caption=”Natalie Cassidy reveals real reason she hasn’t married fiance Marc Humphries after being engaged for almost a decade” embed=”in-page” experience_id=”” height=”100%” language_detection=”” max_height=”360px” max_width=”640px” min_width=”0px” mute=”” padding_top=”56%” picture_in_picture=”” player_id=”default” playlist_id=”” playsinline=”” sizing=”responsive” video_id=”6370767727112″ video_ids=”” width=”640px”]Natalie previously revealed how her brother bought her a touching gift to remember her mum on her 30th birthday.
There’s a plaque in her garden which is engraved with her mum’s name and has flowers growing from it.